gaspersWorld

If you accuse someone of accusing someone else what exactly are you doing?

For what it's worth, this question sprang to my mind in recent posts on facebook.

Sometime back, a close friend pointed out to me that I did something wrong in one of my articles. I objected: "I can't believe you are blaming me!"

I could respond back with fiery recriminations. But if I am blaming someone for blaming me I might as well blame myself for blaming someone.

As we read articles about governments and individuals that are accusing others, when we read about anything that is written by ‘ordinary' individuals of the society, we should learn to be good and brave.

In most Goan cases, it is observed that an accusation can give birth to much (non) sense.

Useful Debates or Personal Attacks?

Debate is an essential part of our culture. Mostly, members of interacting communities always wish to have their viewpoints included on the net. 

But many contributors often do not agree on the content. Many have the tendency to accuse others or each other. This often leads to ‘personal' attacks leaving aside the subject of discussion. And around and around the argument goes, and everyone is seen only arguing about arguing.

As a matter of polite and effective discourse, articles/comments should not be personalized but directed at ‘content' and ‘actions' rather than people. 

Attacking, harassing, or violating the privacy of any person should not be permitted in the media.

..How about just talking with the persons rather than allowing it to get to the stage of an "argument?"

Well, some people, as popular Goan writer Veronica Fernandes often puts it in his articles, don't have marbles to question or call upon a person and discuss things directly.

Usually, people who get loud and continue to argue and go on and on are not getting back what they want - like a discussion, or resolution, or attention even.

I think it might be more productive to ask what they want from you, or just quietly and patiently let them talk and listen to them, and do not react back in an argumentative voice. It is obvious that these people have a habit of accusing others of their own misfortunes. And so much so, they prove to be buffoons -- writing themselves out of reputation when nobody else can do it.

A quote by a Greek philosopher says: "To accuse others of one's own misfortunes is a sign of want of education."

All of this, of course, accomplishes exactly nothing but demonstrates the thin skin behind the cockroach brains of these individuals and their mouse mindset which act as time-wasters.

Well, some readers may find my points weird, some witty, some ridiculous, and it won't be long before rivals believing this write-up is being directed towards them, begin speculating the size of my dick.

Well, in our midst, an unfortunate few, hooked on the futile thrill of media debate, devote their lives to its cause. They roam the internet, actively seeking out viewpoints they disagree with, or squat on social media and groups, needling, over-analyzing each new proclamation - joylessly fiddling, like unhappy monkeys doomed to pick lice from one another's fur for all eternity...

Let's hear out from them in this article..!

P.S: My response (below) to the cynical question of a reader questioning the use of my statement ‘speculating the size of dick' in the article.

-------Original Message-------

From: gaspersWorld
Date: 09/19/08 22:48:52
To: xyz
Cc:

Subject: RE: Arguing about Arguing: Go(a)ne Cases

Hi _________,

It is interesting to note that you read my articles, even more, interesting to know that you have complimented me on the above one.

I have never responded on the net to anyone questioning me on the use of proper English language. As I wrote in this particular article, "People who target others prove to be buffoons -- writing themselves out of reputation when nobody else can do it," Hope you don't fall into this category? Or do you?

If it did, I appreciate that.

I received many opinions (good and bad) from the hundreds of respected and educated readers.

I have heard that old men are fond of giving good advice, to console themselves for being no longer in a position to give bad examples. A priest preaching others should be more philosophical, knowledgeable and exemplary than the subjects..? No one expects people to listen to a sankistanv.

This article or any other is not written because I have a grudge on certain people. I have no grudges. I don't write articles targeting people. The article is a general one and the message goes to many readers across the globe. 

My aim in writing this kind of stuff is to create awareness among our people not to violate the net and time, washing dirty linen in public. But to indulge in healthy, useful and factual debates. To be more diplomatical in what they write and help bring about a change in society and people.

I might have created some enemies with statements that hit certain segments of people, but end of the day I am satisfied that I have done some goodwill in a way I could.

Having written a few articles over the years, I know what to anticipate from readers who get ‘hit' by such write-ups. Before a writer goes public, he has to stand prepared to answer on his lines point by point.

Well, some readers may find my points weird, some witty, some ridiculous, and it won't be long before rivals believing this write-up is being directed towards them, begin speculating the size of my dick.

Here are some examples to digest the above statement in the right frame of mind.

1. What is the meaning of dick?

There is no meaning of 'dick' in the standard dictionary because dick is not an English word. It is a slang word, if you know what slang is and what dick means in slang.

2. speculating the size of my dick - means - thinking/contemplating how much guts I have to watch or to keep others under surveillance.

If dick is what you think, than the Americans would not pride themselves in naming their ex-Vice President Dick Cheney, nor our Goans would use Tom, Dick, and Harry in their popular phrases.

Here are some more..

You don't know the dick about the net - means - you know nothing about the net.

Hope you got what I mean to say. So dude, don't let me dick you again -- means don't let me rough you up again.

Now quit dicking around! - means - quit wasting time.

And

Don't dick with me again - means - don't mess with me or interfere with me again.

You dick wit - means - a fellow who thinks without his brains.

When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong. - Oscar Wilde

It is the inbuilt quality in me to prove people wrong. But ofcourse, when I am wrong, I have the dick to admit I am wrong...

Cheers,
Gasper Crasto
Kuwait - 17.09.2008