Forever & Always - by Agnello A. S. Fernandes

By Agnello A. S. Fernandes / Kuwait (Aquem-Alto)

Our Wedding ceremony had just ended. 

The event was hosted at the Holy Family Cathedral hall, Kuwait, located just adjacent to the main Cathedral. Back in 1980s, the hall was the best known place for functions - reputed and elegant yet an affordable wedding venue.

I clearly remember checking up my watch as the guests made a beeline home. It was somewhere around 2:30 am in the morning.

Later, having arrived at our modestly furnished apartment in Khaitan area (one of the Beverly Hills location of those days) and having cleaned the mess around, the next tough job was to help our friends who had accompanied us from the hall, to leave.

Finally, with the whole emptiness of our home to ourselves, we cuddled as comfortably as possible at a small table, by the window - overlooking Khaitan’s then famous landmark Cinema Granada. We lifted up our glasses to toast to our many years ahead. 

“To both of us,” I said.

“Cheers to us!” she replied.


I had paused briefly to shift my gaze into the dark night. It was unusually windy, a favorable condition for a dusty weather next day. The Airport Road below (now Road 55) connecting to 5th Ring motorway was deserted in the dead of the night.

There was an eerie silence all around.

There we were - two young, bright-eyed, naïve individuals in love. So much of life yet to be lived, so much to learn.

Looking at us at that moment, no one would fathomly predict the jarring road ahead, the surprises - some pleasant some nasty ones, this life would offer us, the hard-fought lessons we would learn, the ways we were yet to grow with, the new additions that we would welcome into our family, and the sweetness and depth of connection our four decades of togetherness would bring.

That momentous milestone was achieved on 4th September 1980.


Today on 4th September 2020, after 40 years, and clocking some 14,600 days, 350,400 hours, 21,024,000 minutes, 3 amazing children with extended family, and 2 beautiful grandchildren (our cherished lifelines), we are one blessed family.

I once read that in marriages that last, each partner can still see in the other the same person they fell in love with, all those years ago.

Even the physical exhaustion of age can’t obliterate the ever-present memory of youthful beauty or extinguish the recollected spark of that first passion. Even as bodies grow old and frail, having experienced joyous moments, fights and arguments,  there remains a powerful, spiritual connection, an unwavering belief in the power of that union, a profound sense that each partner is far stronger together than be alone.


Posting personal and intimate details on social network may be a sign of poor discipline.

With potential monitoring resources all around, this kind of information is not likely to be looked upon as positive. Yet, it is my personal opinion, that as human beings, we constantly crave for positive attention. And appreciating someone is the best way to go about doing it. Again and again.

The problem starts when we don’t even notice how we slip into the habit of taking our partners for granted and stop caring for and appreciating each other.

Today on my part, I’ve mustered the courage to ‘Thank God Almighty’ for this wonderful journey and the wonderful companion and friend he provided me. Many didn’t make it till this milestone. We are fortunate.

“Thank you, Neeta,” for this amazing voyage. My mind is flooded with happy memories of all the moments we've spent together. Although I realize there have been some tough times, they have only served to make our relationship stronger.

I am thankful for those outbursts that didn't let those difficult times defeat and tear us apart.

Thank you for being there whenever I reached out for your hand. This journey would never be possible without you.


Among so many things about you, few that stand out to overwhelm my logic  in understanding you is, your expert characteristic to pretend to enjoy my humor even though most of the gags go over your head. Take a bow for this. Few have this ability.

On numerous other occasions I agree I have gone overboard when I am in the company of friends. But then sincerely I am astonished at your patience to put up with my madness. And yet you go along because you know I enjoy it. Thank you for such an awesome understanding.

And thank you for so many other sacrifices that you do every day for me, those if I jot down and write, will run into volumes.

According to my cardiologist the first destructive atherosclerosis attack to my ventricles occurred way back in 1977 when I first met you on our building staircase. Learned scholars say that every journey starts with the first step. Ours started on our building stairway. Literally.

Since then my doctor has been advising me that cholesterol lowering agents, beta blockers, antioxidants and omega-3 fatty acids are important and should be regularly taken for my longevity.

But I think I have substituted those with your love, to add years to my life.

Stay blessed always darling, Happy 40th Wedding Anniversary. Celebration of our 4th decade means our marriage has passed the test of time. Almost.

No need to explicitly say, “Ï love you”, it is abstractly understood.


The world is undergoing difficult times with the pandemic swirling, although lockdowns have opened up in different versions it does not mean COVID-19 is over. Precautions are still advised. For our past celebrations we tried Plan A and Plan B.

This time we are set to try ‘Plan X’

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